Joke #1
(credit to my Uncle Daniel for teaching us this one)
Q: What do a shark and a grape have in common?
A: They’re both purple. Except for the shark.
Joke #2
(I made this one up a few years ago)
Q: What do you get when you cross a town and a city?
A: Sore legs.
Joke #3: The Squirrel Joke
(This one is a long story joke, so it merits a title. Credit to my Uncle Jako for this one—that was one of the least boring car trips I’ve been on.)
In a treehouse in the forest, there lived a family of squirrels: Mummy Squirrel, Daddy Squirrel, and Teenage Squirrel.
They all lived happily in their treehouse—until one day, Daddy Squirrel came into Teenage Squirrel’s room after saying goodnight and saw him disappearing out of his bedroom window on a long piece of rope, with a backpack.
Daddy Squirrel didn’t tell Mummy Squirrel because he didn’t want to worry her. But he did want to know where Teenage Squirrel was going. So the next day, he went to the squirrel hardware store and bought himself a rope.
That night, he waited around the corner to Teenage Squirrel’s bedroom, until he heard the faint and barely audible sound of the window being opened, and then he crept into the room, looked around to make sure Teenage Squirrel couldn’t see him, then threw his rope out the window as well, and followed Teenage Squirrel out.
He watched as Teenage Squirrel made his way through the forest, all the way to a river. This must be where he’s going, Daddy Squirrel thought.
But no—Teenage Squirrel reached into his backpack, pulled out an inflatable raft, and paddled across the river to the other side.
The next day, Daddy Squirrel went to the squirrel hardware store and bought himself an inflatable raft, and a backpack to keep it in.
That night, he followed Teenage Squirrel out of the treehouse, through the forest, and across the river. He watched as Teenage Squirrel got to a big patch of fast-growing bamboo. This must be where he’s going, Daddy Squirrel thought.
But no—Teenage Squirrel reached into his backpack and pulled out a machete. He hacked through the fast-growing bamboo, and before Daddy Squirrel could follow him in, the bamboo had grown and covered up his path.
The next day, Daddy Squirrel went to the squirrel hardware store and bought a machete. That night, he followed Teenage Squirrel out of the treehouse, through the forest, across the river, and through the fast-growing bamboo … all the way to a steep cliff.
Surely this must be where he’s going, Daddy Squirrel thought.
But no—again, Teenage Squirrel reached into his backpack and pulled out a grappling hook. He hooked it up to the top and then started climbing down.
The next day was a Saturday, and the squirrel hardware store was closed for the weekend. But on Monday, Daddy Squirrel went to the squirrel hardware store and bought a grappling hook.
That night, he followed Teenage Squirrel out of the treehouse, through the forest, across the river, through the fast-growing bamboo, and down the cliff. All the way to a deep, dark cave. Daddy Squirrel walked into the cave and found Teenage Squirrel, along with a HUGE pile of nuts.
He frowned. “Son, what are you doing?”
Teenage Squirrel froze, finally realizing he’d been followed.
He looked up, and at last responded.
“Nutting.”
Emily Brown is a teen author, poet, and singer/songwriter from Australia. She has so far been published in the Write the World Review as well as here in Pure in Heart Stories. You can also find her on YouTube under the stage name Emmi Byrd, where she hopes to glorify God and encourage listeners through her music and lyrics.
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